People who are tired and worn-out, uptight and irritated, usually spend a lot of time complaining about it, but they do little or nothing to change it. They want to understand why they feel the way they feel, but even if someone told them, they still probably wouldn’t change a thing. We feel trapped! We actually think we have to do all the things we do, but the truth is that we don’t. If you got sick and had to be hospitalized for a month, life would go on. Either someone else would do what you were doing, or — shockingly — it might just not get done at all, with no adverse reaction.
I am not suggesting we ignore our responsibilities, but I do believe we need to learn that we cannot do everything we want to do, or everything everyone else wants us to do. The first key to lowering your stress level is to learn to say no.
We cannot be people-pleasers and keep stress at a manageable level.
We cannot even do everything everyone else does. Some people are able to accomplish more than others, but we must learn to live within our limits.
Everyone has limits, but they are not all the same. I make every fast decisions, but I know other people who need more time to make decisions and that is fine. I also have an unusual amount of endurance. These abilities are God’s grace enabling me to do what He has given me to do.
I had an assistant who tried to keep up with me, and she seemed to be doing great and loved it all. But she ended up almost collapsing mentally, emotionally and physically. She wanted to please me so much that she wasn’t honest with me about her limits. I can sometimes expect too much out of people because I can accomplish a lot, but it is nto may fault if they don’t communicate with me about what they feel they can do and be healthy and happy. Quite often people don’t communicate honestly with their employers because they fear they might lose their jobs. But, even if that were the case, they would be far better off to lose the job and get another one instead of being stressed out all the time.
One of our biggest stressors in life can be comparing ourselves to and competing with other people. The good news is that you are free to be yourself. You don’t need to ever try to be someone else.
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