Building your profile on your chosen site is an incredibly important step. Sites will often offer tips to a successful profile, such as: “tell others what your hobbies and interests are,” or “describe what you look for in a partner.” Do these things. You wouldn’t go to a job interview without a resume, and you shouldn’t have an account on a dating site without a description. There is nothing more disheartening than when attractive set of pictures and a witty tagline yields a profile where the about me says, “Ask me.” Invariably, I cringe when this happens. What do I ask you about? What if you like football, and hate dogs? Why would I waste my time talking to you? Actually, I wish there was a filtering option to get rid of profiles that lack descriptions, like the one that gets rid of profiles with no pictures.
If you’re shy, or you struggle with talking about yourself, it’s time to make another list. Write down things you're good at, things you enjoy doing, favorite books, movies and shows, foods, drinks, fun hangout spots. You know who you are; tell your potential soul mate who you are too. Don't be afraid, either, to embrace and address the important characteristics you wrote down. If your Presbyterian faith is essential to your life, say that. Conversely, if you happen to be Presbyterian and you casually attend services on important holidays, make that clear. The same is true of politics and dog or cat person preferences. If you're still struggling with your profile, another idea is to bring in a friend whom you trust and who knows you well. You could discuss the kinds of things you'd like to include, and have the friend draft a description, or collaborate with you to write one.
The description is the meat of your profile, but once that’s done, put some serious conversation into selecting profile pictures. Think about what kind of impression you’d like to make. Are you artsy, quirky, geeky, or preppy? These may all be stereotypes, but they’re just examples. Choose whatever pictures you feel most embody you. Never select only group shots or only selfies, however. Group shots can be frustrating to a potential matchi if it’s difficult to pick you out of the crowd; one or two selfies denote confidence while nothing but selfies seems to express vanity. A variety is best. Pick a few that show you having fun with friends, one showing you doing an activity you enjoy, a portrait or even a selfie that shows a good close of your face. Try to select photos that are good quality, but not too good. For some reason, psychologically, too many perfect studio portraits can meke your profile seem fake. At the same time, if all your photos are grainy and taken in badly lit spaces, they may not make a psoitive impression. Remember too, that whether guy or girl, it’s okay to be a little bit sexy, but don’t overdo it. If you’re truly searching for your soul mate, you don’t want to risk sending the wrong impression. From personal experience, I have found that chosing not to post overtly sexy pictures has kept the number of rude and fruitless messages I receive to a minimum. There’s nothing wrong with being a little sexy though, and I find that beach pictures are generally appropriate. Guys take note: mirror selfies of your abare a lot less flattering than if you were shirtless on a boat.
Finally, you have to decide on your main thumbnail picture, your tagline, and your filters. I would highly suggest a thumbnail picture that is close in on your face, and shows off your features well. Smiles are always a good choice. When selecting a tagline, pick something witty, engaging or interesting. Instead of just saying, “Hi” or “Get at Me,” perhaps put the beginning of a favorite joke, or a line from a book or movie that means a lot to you. This will get people interested and is more likely to prompt them to click on your profile. After you’ve got everything in your profile how you want it, set filters so that only those matches you’d prefer will be able to contact you. Filters will vary from site to site, but they’ll include things like gender, age range, location range, height, body type, and intent.
Do not, when filling out dating profiles, make personally identifiable information such as your phone number or address publicly available. If, at any point in the interaction, the other person asks for a phone number and you don’t feel comfortable providing it, be aware that there are other apps that will allow you to communicate with them as quickly as text without giving out a private number. These include Viber, Kik, and even Instagram, all of which are free. If you do feel comforable, go ahead and provide your information. Otherwise, take precautions, and meet at a location where you could even have a trusted friend sit nearby without the other person being aware of it.
Now comes the fun part: meeting people who could potentially be your soul mate!
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