What Is Your Story of Passing up Opportunities?

Author Mark Manson From Models: Attract Women Through Honesty 6 years ago 8667

I’m going to tell you about my story of passing up an opportunity. I park my car in front of the gym and immediately pop my headphones into my ears. As I get out and walk across the parking lot, I catch a glimpse of a slender figure walking toward the door from another angle. I look over. She's hot.


We catch eyes and hold. She looks away, but only after holding my gaze for a half-second longer than most people would. An instant of sexual tension pops up between us.


She walks into the gym about ten paces ahead of me. I check out her ass. It says '"PINK.” It’s those fuzzy kind of tight sweat suits girls wear sometimes. My mind immediately judges this. For some reason, I think she’s trashy. I have to stop myself. What do I know? Nothing.


For a moment, we're at the sign-in desk next to one another.


I start scanning in my mind for something to say to her. But before I can settle on something her phone rings and she answers it. “Oh god, one of those girls,” instinctively say to myself. Again I have to stop myself. I don't know her. But obviously, if I’m dedicating such mental energy to her, I probably should.


For a few seconds in my head, I toy with some logistical scenarios that would allow me to talk to her later — like pretend I have to go to the bathroom so I can come back and hopefully catch her off her phone. No, that’s too contrived. I could just approach her in the gym while we’re working out. But to be honest, that has never gone well for me in the past and I’m here to work out, not to make friends. Or maybe I do my workout and try to time it so that I’m leaving when she is. Then I would feel like a stalker. Theoretically, these things could work, but my mind’s losing interest. My head-phones are blaring and my mind is working its way towards the squat rack.


I’m not going to lie and say that despite all of my hedging and indifference that I magically came up with some miraculous line that saved the day. Because I didn't talk to her. In fact, I don’t remember seeing her again or thinking of her until I wrote this. So I didn't save the day. But then again there was nothing wrong with my day and there still isn’t.


I’m also not going to sit here, as is typical with these types of books, and chastise myself for bitching out, for being a pussy, and for not manning up. It’s not that big of a deal. And I’m also not going to give you, my humble reader, yet another lecture on how you should never bitch out, how you should always, always, always talk to her, no matter what, you fucking pussy — even if she's at the gym, on the phone, juggling knives, doing a handstand, changing a flat tire or administering CPR — you always fucking chat her up, goddamnit.


Let’s be honest, we all pass up dozens of situations like the above on a weekly basis, no matter how experienced or inexperienced we are. We’ve all let hundreds, if not thousands of opportunities go, usually without a thought or even realizing it. We’ve all done it. And we’ll all continue to do it.


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