Kids, health issues, depression, financial woes, an angry stalker or maybe a total lack of trust are all common examples of the baggage people bring into a relationship. Nearly every couples have baggages, even we think we don't. Sometimes no baggage is even baggage. If a couple has been married for many years and leave peacefully and happliy for a long time. They'll still receive criticism even if for having no kids at all. Hereby this passage will introduce ways to expose your baggage properly and ways to get his baggage exposed early.
Three ways to expose your baggage properly
Get it out there
If a man finds out you have kids on the second date, we will feel duped. Maybe not because you have kids, but because you left it out on the first date. A man will wonder what else you left out. This doesn't mean it needs to be the first sentence out of your mouth, but make this information available to him early so he can decide if this is okay or not.Remember, every man has some baggage too, and it’s sitting there, just like yours. Men are actually relieved when a woman is honest about baggage.
Keep it light and tell him you are working on it.
If you have some bad baggage, frame it in a light-hearted way. If you have trust issues, you might say, “I’m doing my best to trust men, but it’s been a hard road.” This is good. It tells him you are working on trusting more. Other women will say, “I’ve been screwed over so many times in the past with guys, I can’t trust anymore.”Then you should explore the exit.
If it's minor, leave it be.
Men are tough and have dealt with some really bad women. Stalkers, coke heads and out right crazies have crossed most guys paths if they’ve dated into their thirties. Don't sweat it.
If you have major emotional issues, you should not be dating. These need to be dealt with professionally, first. A man is not the answer.
Now, you’re wondering how to find out about his baggage. I thought you would never ask. First off, don't ask him, because he probably won’t tell you.
I know, men can suck, and I’m not always proud of what I tell you about men, but it's the truth. You wouldn't want it any other way.
You can ask him if he has kids. Kids may or may not be baggage to you. You can ask him about his job. If he doesn’t have a job, then this is baggage. If he has a crappy job, then this could be baggage. But when you ask him about drugs, alcohol or herpes, it begins to sound more like an interview and he may get defensive, even though these are legitimate concerns.
lf you start to get serious with any man, do a criminal record check on him. Does he think too much? Does he drive drunk? Does he mention or do drugs? Does he get mad easily? Is he a complainer? Is he a tightwad? Is he a slob, an over-spender or just plain lazy?
You are a woman of value. Look for these things. In the past, maybe you just saw an awesome body or stunning baby blue eyes. Now, you know what qualities you must have in a man, and where you will and will not compromise. You have an abundance of men because you have interests and you have met various quality men through these interests.
This is your new playbook and what a difference it will make!
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