Why You Are Your Own Highest Authority in Marriage?

It’s true. Sometimes you’ll receive well-intended advice that doesn’t seem to give with what you’re feeling. Just like the shortest path between two points is a straight line, the shortest path to a happy life is through conscious choice. But in order to make conscious choices you need to be very clear about what’s most important to you. No one else, expert or not, can tell you this, because you are your own highest authority in marriage.

Opinions Are a Dime a Dozen

Opinions are a dime a dozen. Everyone has plenty of them and they like nothing better than to share them with others.

So it’s best to be mindful when forming your opinions. You can develop opinions by reading the advice of others, but don’t leave yourself out. After you listen to the experts, ask yourself, “Does this advice seem true for me, and will this advice support me and others in my life?”

Just like you have opinions based on your life experiences, every expert explores areas they care about deeply and that hold meaning for them. From this perspective they develop the specific strategies that they find helpful and hope will help others create a meaningful experience in their lives as well.

If an expert thinks divorcing a spouse immediately based on one episode of cheating is a viable option, their opinion must be based on some deeply held values in this area. Maybe this strategy works for you or maybe it doesn’t. You really can’t know unless you truly understand what you want to create in your life at a core level, for both yourself and your spouse.

When you understand what this is, you may find other strategies that will help you experience what’s important to you that don’t involve divorce, or any of the other strategies recommended by the experts.

The Only True Authority

You are your own highest authority!

We honestly believe this. Look within yourself to discover what you value deeply about all aspects of the problems or frustrations you face in your relationship. If you're like most individuals you may think you know what you value in your life. You really do have an idea of what you value in yourself and in your relationship. What you really value will provide you with greater clarity about how to move ahead.