From boyhood on, men seem to tune in to sexuality more overtly and, in an unfair way, are regarded as the sexual experts. Girls are taught psychologically to control sexual impulses and do not tune in to sexuality as readily. Even their genitals are more hidden and not grasped every time they urinate as men’s are. The environment also takes a toll on sexual desire. In the midst of busyness and children, husbands often fear their wives could go days without sex being that much of a priority.
God gave each woman responsibility for her own body and for learning to experience sexual pleasure. Perhaps you are disappointed that lovemaking hasn't fallen into place as easily as you expected it to or you are not easily orgasmic. Don't be too hard on yourself. You won't think of sex as often as your husband does and your sexual desire will be expressed differently. You usually will have to take longer to become orgasmic, but this can be good as the sexual process is slowed down and enjoyed.
Do take control of your sexuality and tune in to cues more readily, for your own pleasure and your husband's. Here are ten conscious choices that you can make—and women are much more likely to make conscious sexual choices than men—to focus in on sexual cues and keep lovemaking on the front burner of your marriage：
1.Budget and spend a certain amount of money each month on your sex life.
2.Every now and then wear a sexy piece of lingerie underneath your clothing all day and allow its unusual feel to remind you of sex constantly.
3.Don't wear any underwear to a social gathering, and tell your husband on the way out the door. You will drive him crazy while you stay aroused.
4.Plan a sexual surprise at least once a month in which you try to blindside your husband in an arousing sexual way.
5.Keep a mental note, and regardless of fatigue or low interest, initiate sex at least once a week.
6.Have fun with your husband’s visual arousal, and flaunt your nude body at unusual times just to enjoy his reactions.
7.Take a bubble bath and indulge in other sensual delights at the end of a tiring day—it is a great aphrodisiac and tunes you in to your body. In the midst of all your demands, you must learn to be self-nurturing. It will keep you sexier.
8.Create romantic sexual fantasies while driving in the car and share them with your mate at the end of your day. You will have to consciously think about sex more.
9.Use a special perfume that you have associated in your mind with making love, and wear it on the evening or the day you anticipate sexual activity.
10.Practice Kegel exercises.
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