"Your personal core values define who you are, and a company's core values ultimately define the company's character and brand. For individuals, character is destiny. For organizations, culture is destiny."-Tony Hsieh
Values are a part of us and they always highlight what we stand for and even represent our unique and individual essence. Most of our behaviors are guided by values and they provide us with a personal code of conduct. Moreover, people tend to experience fulfillment when honoring their peronal core values consistently. In contrast, without the guidance of good values, we are more likely to escape into bad habits and regret for any childish behavior. When we don't honor our values, our mental, emotional and physical state will suffer.
Values are so important that we need them to guide our conducts and behaviors everyday. Focusing on what you value most in life is how you can use your past to inform and mold your future - a new improved future. The past has gone forever and would never come back. But your future is unpredictable. Therefore, you have to believe that it's possible for you to have what you value in the future due to the unpredictibility of the future. Even you may have lost your value in the past, it's possible for you to have what you value in the future.
You should learn to decide to make very specific goals for how you can experience more of what you value in the future and then take actions to make those experiences happend. To better set your goals and establish your values, you are advised to read relevant books and consult people succefully in both their family and career life.
There is certainly no guarantee that you will get what you want and your future can't be predicted by the past. But you should remember that your marriage - and each and every relationship in your life has a better chance of surviving if you can succeed in leaving the past behind, especially if it's a great past you would rather not repeat.
Keep the motto in mind: what you focus your attention on grows. If you continue paying attention to experiencing what you value - we're pretty sure that you're going to see positive results. You shall strongly believe that not only you'll gain positive results but also all the relationships troubles from the past can finally take their rightful place as mere memories, not predictions or prophecies of your future.