God created every person uniquely individual, and sexy in his or her own right. The psalmist David s aid that God knew him even before he was born and carefully made him a unique crea tion in his mother’s womb: “ I will praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made" (Ps. 139 14 NXJV). Your body is fearfully and wonderfully made and God hopes you will accept and agree with His opinion.
God did not intend for you to feel compelled to measure up to some arbitrary standard youthfulness is sexy and older bodies are unappealing; slim is bad but hippy is worse. He affirms your body and wishes you could, too.
Do you have a difficult time complimenting and affirming your own sexiness? To affirm a positive body image, the following exercises can help. Ladies, I know that you are shaking your heads and thinking, A man must be writing this chapter. Granted, it would probably I be easier for you to learn Russian than change your body image. But let God and your husband and your own desire tofeel less self-conscious and more secure help motivate these changes. Please persist through to a healthier self-perception and more sexy lovemaking.
1.Stand in front of the mirror and start with the top of your head and make affirmation statements about every part of your body: “This is my hair, and it is great hair”; "This is my nose, and I love my nose"; and "These are my legs, and they support me well." When you get to your genitals, name each part as you affirm even the body parts you cannot see. Proceed to your feet.
2.Get a sheet of paper and write on it the same affirmation statement twenty times until your knowledge starts to conivct with your feelings:”My body doesn't need to be perfect to enjoy sexual pleasure”; I believe my body is sexy, it is; or "My penis/vagina is marvelous, and I love the excitement it gives my mate.” Think up more affirmation statements that will heal your damaged body image and your inability to feel sexy.
God also holds you accountable to help your mate be the most secure and confident lover possible. You have a tremendous opportunity to help your partner feel great about his or her body. It is not always natural to give compliments generously to another person, but that should be one of your goals with your mate and your children. Lavish praise and affirmation on your partner. This is tougher for some men to do than for most women. Men may tend to be less self-disclosing and more one-dimensional in what they enjoy. That is, men often separate the body from the personality and a loving relationship, which can make them very critical.
Your mate will be much more involved and feel more sexy, knowing that you admire and appreciate his or her body and sexuality. If you exclaim over arousing nipples, cute legs; seductive eyes, gentle hands, and an overwhelming penis or vagina, maldng love will blossom. Continual compliments as you see your mate step out of the shower or while you romp around the bedroom will pay great dividends. You have the power to make a real difference in your mate’s self-image There is one hitch, though: you have to learn to take compliments and believe what your mate says about you. You have allow your mate to affirm you and increase your positive self-image and the way you think about your own body.
Insist that your mate learn to take a compliment and feel affirmed. Ask for an acknowledgment of compliments given. Keep giving affirmation statements until they sink in and become belief. Husband, be prepared for this to take a long time—probably a lifetime—with your wife, who, after all, is a woman.
Time Out: You and your mate do this at the same time. Get pen and paper and write a short paragraph bragging on your partner as the most fantastic lover ever. List all the physical characteristics you love, personal appeal and charm, the activity that really arouses you, and so on. You may want to try it on a weekend away so you can fall into bed together and enjoy the exciting ambiance created by the affirmation as you share your lists.
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